Are you a Bad Boss?

So you think you are a great Leader do you? What if you are not really, what if you are portraying the first signs of bully leadership - what can you do about it?

Bad Leaders are made, not born. I believe that everyone has the capacity in them to be an amazing Leader both of themselves and of others. Sadly in today’s competitive world, in a climate of fear we are seeing the return of the corporate bully. It starts with you. It is down to you and it will be because of you that the people you lead succeed or fail.

First step is to improve your self-awareness. It is no good blaming others or pretending you don’t know what you are doing or the effect it has. Stop and think about who you really are. What are your strengths and what are your gaps? What stresses you? What are your triggers? What are you afraid of? Where did this come from? What makes you angry and where did this come from? Know how you are feeling and why? Don’t let the past control you.

Second step is to improve your self-management. You may have intense responses to the triggers but do not let yourself down by responding unprofessionally. Stay calm. Take time before you respond. Read the poem ‘If‘ by Rudyard Kipling and take note of it all. Don’t shout, don’t raise your voice and don’t say or do anything you will regret later. Don’t lie to yourself or others. Listen to feedback; hear what someone else is really saying. Exercise to clear yourself of the anger and fear which is driving you.

Third step is to build your awareness of others. Notice all the cues. See, hear and notice the effect your behaviour is having on them. See the change in expression, a change of body language, posture, eye contact. Don’t ignore what you are seeing before you. Ask questions, take an interest in someone. Find out about them, put yourself in their shoes. The person who is causing you the most issues is there for a reason. They are there to teach you something about you – what is that? Build rapport with them.

Fourth step is to build strong relationships with all the key people in your business. Build the trust, have open debate, talk about what really needs to be talked about. What are you not saying that if said would make the difference? Have ‘clean and clear’ conversations. Build your influence; make a positive impact on everyone you meet in your life because the legacy you leave will stay forever. Make sure it’s a positive one.

So in summary;

• Do take responsibility for your behaviours and your actions
• Don’t blame anyone else. Don’t make them wrong and you right
• Talk about the real issues. Don’t avoid the elephants! Don’t have half a conversation
• Don’t manipulate for your own justification,self-belief and confidence
• Stop being controlling. Stay calm inside and ask open questions instead
• Stop using the ‘must’ ‘have to’ ‘should do’- Empower and coach someone to make their own decisions as they will grow and learn quicker
• Stop deleting, distorting and generalising the facts of a situation. Instead be honest. Replay what exactly happened not what you made of it
• Don’t take the credit for what someone else has done. Be brave and recognise them
• Don’t call, email them at all times of the weekend, night or when they are on holiday. Give them space to recover and reenergise
• Don’t belittle, dis-empower and ‘bully’ anyone
• … and if you still know deep inside that you have the potential to be a bad leader then get some professional help before it’s too late and you have destroyed the spirit of your team, your organisation and personal careers

Take personal responsibility now and make 2012 the year you focus on ‘how’ to lead.

What is your Vision of Success?